Yesterday and the day before, I really wanted to
drink in the evenings. I even had ample opportunity as I was alone in the kitchen
with my husband's new bottle of whiskey.
But something held me back.
Yesterday, I felt so frustrated yesterday because I 'gained' 2 lbs overnight,
putting me at the heaviest I've been in years. I thought stopping
drinking would result in weight loss, not gain. I know I've been craving
sugar more.
But fortunately today, I dropped 1.6
of those two lbs, so maybe it was just water weight. I'm sure that
alcohol had dehydrated me, making my weight seem lighter than it really
was. It's still frustrating though.
I have to
remember why I am doing this. Weight is not the primary motivator.
Alcohol was ironically robbing me of my joy in life, making it so the
only time I could be 'happy' was when I was drinking, and then I was
miserable the rest of the time. Now, I can say I'm not miserable when
I'm not drinking. I look forward to things outside of alcohol. Like tomorrow,
on my day off, I'm planning a big grocery shopping trip and a
healthy lunch at Jason's Deli. Maybe a pedicure as well, with all the
money I've saved on not buying alcohol (through this weekend, at least
$30 worth -that's a pedicure!) And doing cleaning around the house. I
actually find it soothing and look forward to it.
Life continues to be better this way, regardless of my weight.
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