Day 10: Life is not fair.

Today, my weight was down 0.4 lbs and I feel a little less lethargic. But it is really hard to focus on work. I have no meetings, and the day seems to stretch on endlessly. It's hard to get motivated on even the simplest of tasks. And I feel demotivated by what happened yesterday...in addition to already feeling sad and lethargic, I got some disappointing news. I am no longer going to get to go to some training I have been really looking for. Of course, I wanted to drown my sorrows in drink. Instead, I went to the store and wandered around, talked to my husband at length, went for a walk, and watched a TV show.

 

And it was okay. I was okay. This past week, I have been learning that I can handle tough stuff without turning to drink. Yes, I have to feel it and that stinks, but it's better than stuffing it down temporarily only to have it bubble up later.

 

Another positive that I have noticed is that it is very rare for me to have headaches now. I think I've had 1-2 total in the past 10 days, and very mild ones at that.

It's amazing to have things other than drinking to look forward to. Again.I'm going to explore other soothing activities like crocheting and maybe those adult coloring books. It sounds silly, but it beats drinking.

The more distance I put between myself and drinking, the more foreign it seems. I remember at the beginning I couldn't see how I could live without it. Now I can see the possibility,  and it's not as frightening.